Vena Cava Is Trying To Kill Me

($344, Vena Cava x Tenoversix, boutiques.refinery29.com)

It is obvious, based on the fact that Vena Cava x Tenoversix's collaboration has resulted in a red-orange shoe with a BLUE Lucite heel, that they have conspired to kill me, or at least give me a serious heart attack. If perfection could kill, you'd be reading my obit.

Can I Legally Mary These Booties?

Well, first the US needs to get its shit together and let ANYONE who loves each other and wants to commit to each other get married.
THEN I would like to hold a referendum on the legality of marrying these sculptural LD Tuttle booties:

($747, LD Tuttle, Refinery29.com)

If and when that happens, everyone who reads FashionBinge will be invited to my polygamist (since I'm already married) wedding. I will make Catherine be a bridesmaid again. 

Object Of My Desire: Loeffler Randall Snakeskin Belinda Pump

($332, Loeffler Randall, Refinery29.com)

Are you KIDDING me? And I love how, from afar, they look like newsprint. But NOPE! NOT NEWSPRINT! SNAKESKIN! And a SNAKESKIN ROSETTE? Um, "LIKES THIS!"

Also, as much as I NO lovey U2, I DO love this song, which perfectly expresses my longing for the above Loeffler Randall heels.

Binge Bag: Life With Bird Bag

($130, Life With Bird, Refinery29.com)

Granted, I need a new bag like Park Slope needs another Maclaren, but if I were in the market for a superfluous new bag, I'd go with this very '80s geometrical tote. Geotote! Actually, I COULD use it as a gym bag for my new CrossFit habit. And yes, I've read the Times piece.